i want the world to stop. i want time to freeze so i can relax and take a break from everything--family, friends, school--everything and just think.

i'm so sick of weighing the pros and cons of everything. i wish i could just be. i hate worrying about every decision effecting so many people and things.

i am beginning to wonder if i will ever be happy wherever i am. even at the pool where i was so content, i would still be a bit sad about missing ian or wishing abby wasn't in mexico. i'm never going to be completely satisfied so shouldn't i just make the best out of what i have at that time?

life. ugh.